as a marriage therapist for two decades, i’ve seen what happens to marriages when one spouse has little or no desire for sex and the other yearns for it desperately. if you’re the spouse whose libido is lacking, remember that your most powerful sexual organ is your brain; in order to feel more sexual, you first have to decide that a loving, satisfying sex life and marriage are important. am i saying you should have sex any time your spouse desires or that you should go through the motions just to keep peace? hormones don’t have to be raging; you don’t need an overwhelming feeling of passion. identify what’s different about the times you feel more inclined, and take advantage of those moments. if you decide to give the gift of being sexual even when you don’t feel like it, don’t be resentful, or it really isn’t a gift.
when you truly take this to heart, it will take the sting out of your reactions to your mate. and what if your spouse, the person you love most, had no understanding of what you’re going through? while you’re unhappy about the difference in your sexual appetites, you’re not alone; your spouse isn’t having a picnic either. if so, be willing to acknowledge your contribution to the problem and to change yourself. try to give your spouse the benefit of the doubt. or you can decide to accept what isn’t changeable about your marriage. and above all, pray about it, asking god to help both of you change, if necessary, to renew the spark in your sexual intimacy.
this is not so much an article with sex in a christian marriage tips as it is an overview of the topic – to be clear. there is not a place in scripture that tells you to stay in danger or endure abuse by your spouse. this in no way is a blanket statement, it is just what i have learned from my own life and from counseling wives over the years. the first step in how to fix intimacy problems in a marriage is to acknowledge that men and women have different sexual needs and expectations. regardless of the craziness of my day or the season of life i am living in, i have to be mindful of my husband and his desires. if your spouse is asking for things outside of god’s design for sex in a christian marriage you have every right to say no. in the bedroom when the clothes go away i am suddenly anxious, ashamed, embarrassed, and desperate to hide. when the lights go down and the clothes come off and you want to hide or rush… remind yourself that you are beautiful. ug that sounds so a-type and like a complete romance kill joy… but it is all i can do in this crazy busy season of life. i am not going to lie to you here, this is an ongoing battle. we need to find a way to balance the chaos and invest in our marriage while we have a marriage to invest in. i work through the process of forgiveness over and over again, but sometimes it overwhelms me and i choose to ignore the hurt. in the praying, i forgive him for not being perfect and living up to my expectations. it has taken years of counseling and conversations with my husband to be in a place where this is no longer the issue… most of the time. i suffer from autoimmune disease and can attest to the struggle with things in your body not being balanced. these are all the ways to have a great sexual relationship in your marriage. there has to be a reason he is behaving this way and god promises to give us wisdom when we ask (james 1:5). and praying for you to keep faith and turn to god with all of your anger and frustration. and he is happy as long as i don’t have feelings about anything, except to express how happy i am with him. times like these, i struggle not to look back at men i turned away for my husband and struggle not to let myself daydream of another man or even no man at all. i am also praying for your husband to have a wake up call to how blessed he is and how he should be treating his wife. i always think that god really love me so much to give me this kind of challenges. you and i have the same issues.
i love that your heart wants to help and shine the truth in love… can i advise caution? i’d never lay the responsibility of his fall to my behavior 100%… but i believe in a marriage we each contribute to the others chance for success or failure. these are some resources shared with me for you and the countless others in this situation. pornography really takes hold of us in so many ways we never imagined… and once you are hooked it is hard to see that the addiction is destroying your spouse. my husband is a godly man and i trust him. i absolutely do not have enough time in the day to let my husband work up a sweat on top of me. and when i come to god in humility – saying i don’t get this but i trust you and want to do it your way- he meets me where i am and honors my obedience. when that is taken to the extreme or beyond what god intended or what the partner wants and is comfortable with there are other issues that need to be addressed for sure. however, i truly believe you are missing out on god’s best for you- to be desired by and to desire your spouse with out shame or guilt. and all three are needed to enjoy a fulfilling sex life, and to enjoy our marriage to the fullest. i did not try to talk, i did not try to build trust, i just started wanting him and not caring what he had said in the past or how he had made me feel. however, you have an opportunity to be the source of your husband’s pleasure. it is possible to use the metaphor of chocolate to describe many things, but i don’t thing that was the intended message. the topic of sexual intimacy is not to be taken lightly and i’d love a new analogy. he may have let a comment here and there about what he likes about me slip so with everything i read i have confidence going into this marriage especially the marriage night which is going to be awkward and new with ease and not angst. my concern in my marriage is tha my husband and i have sex only once every 3-4months and ghis has been the case for the last 6 years that we have been married. when i let go all the lies, fake image and let him to see me truly as i am. i do believe that intimacy is important in a marriage and communication with your partner is always the key tiffany, i don’t know if you are still monitoring the comments on this page, but i hope you are. in this century i believe the photoshopped beauty we are aiming for is unhealthy and not the best way to care for god’s temple. it is still not something wonderful to me, but i have found helpful in learning what god says about sex. i think a better way to look at the “need” of sexual fulfilment is to see it from the song of solomon 8:4. submission is a choice we make and it can be a difficult choice for sure. this is one i need to come back to and update.
studies have shown repeatedly that bible-believing christian married couples have more sex and enjoy sex more than their non-christian there are three categories of sexual problems: physical, relational, and a combination of the two. sexual issues are a primary cause of broken marriages. when a couple puts their sex life on autopilot, they are taking the risk of allowing the power of sex, sexually incompatible christian marriage, sexually incompatible christian marriage, christian marriage intimacy stories, christian marriage intimacy ideas, sexual intimacy in marriage.
one out of every three couples struggle with problems associated with low sexual desire. one study found that 20 percent of married couples have sex fewer a hard truth. your husband was created by god with sexual desires. those desires are not sinful if the lack of sex in marriage is due to the wife refusing intimacy, the husband should consider if he is being obedient to god’s command to, erectile dysfunction in christian marriages, christian intimacy website.
When you try to get related information on sexual problems in christian marriage, you may look for related areas. sexually incompatible christian marriage, christian marriage intimacy stories, christian marriage intimacy ideas, sexual intimacy in marriage, erectile dysfunction in christian marriages, christian intimacy website.