there are a lot of good reasons why some women like me prefer older men, and i am going to enumerate some of them here. there are many women out there who seek out and build relationships with older men, so much so that there is a term for it in the western world, the may—december romance. when you start a family, for example, it is important that the man is able to provide security. just think about it for a second: older men have had the time to develop and practice their skills at pleasing women. they also know that when it comes to food and drinks, quality does not always come with a hefty price. they always rely on their mothers to cook for them and take care of all their needs, and that is not my cup of tea. i also don’t find myself enjoying the company of younger men and talking to them endlessly because their choice of topics does not jive with my interests.
older men also tend to realize that the kind of party-heavy lifestyle many young men focus on is unsustainable and not good for one’s health. while it is true that i am happily in a relationship with an older guy now, there are some potential downsides to be aware of. question: i am in my early twenties and i am beginning to suspect that a much older co-worker (probably in his 60’s) is trying to flirt with me. that is the right thing to do, but of course, you need to do it in a clear but subtle manner. this huge age gap in a relationship is really difficult to handle and does not work out very well most of the time. i think he also has a crush on me because he says and does things that indicate he is interested. people will always have something to say whatever you do, but it is merely a reflection of theirs and nothing to do with you. the teacher should also know that it is illegal and unethical to be involved with his students so for now, having a crush on your teacher is normal but your focus should be on your studies and friends and not him.
there are many temptations to organize our life around the experience of earlier trauma. stereotypes aside, many women cite maturity, wisdom, and financial stability as good reasons to date men who are older. but regardless of the legitimacy of motive, both parties in men-older age gap relationships often have to overcome stigma and stereotype. what is it about seeing an older man with a much younger adult woman in public holding hands that gives some people pause? [i] in terms of gender differences, they found that the link between perceived relational inequity and prejudice was higher when the man in a relationship was older, rather than the woman. in explaining the rationale behind perceiving that an older man in a relationship has the upper hand, collisson and de leon note that even labels used to describe partners in age-gap relationships imply relational inequity. but contrary to stereotype, many age-gap couples do not display even the appearance of ulterior financial or professional motives.
looking for ulterior motives to explain atypical pairings of mature men and much younger women, some have advanced theories about women seeking older men due to relational dynamics with their own fathers. sara skentelbery and darren fowler (2016) investigated the attachment styles of heterosexual women who date older men. they also recognize the commonly held belief that women who date men who are 10 or more years older have unhealthy relationships with their fathers. in fact, they found that 74 percent of the women in age-gap relationships enjoyed a relationship within which they were securely attached. we can safely assume that there will always be couples that seek to pair up for ulterior motives, perhaps in pursuit of a marriage of convenience. but research also seems to suggest that, happily, true love is still alive and well. “attachment styles of women-younger partners in age-gap relationships.” evolutionary behavioral sciences 10 (2): 142–47. there are many temptations to organize our life around the experience of earlier trauma.
an older man and younger woman relationship can work wonders for women who are looking for men who will stay present with them, who are calm and stable and who women do not date older men just because they want easy money or have daddy issues. read on for the real reasons women date older guys. while an older man dating a younger woman tends to raise less eyebrows than a woman’s romance with a younger man, the dynamic isn’t exactly, younger woman older man dating sites, why am i sexually attracted to older men?, what attracts an older man to a younger woman, how to tell if a younger woman likes an older man.
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