the closer we get to one another, the more likely we are to experience personality clashes or find elements of the other person that we don’t like. there are certain boundaries you will want to set and stick to so that you can support your friend without owning their problems. if they are talking to you about their relationship problems, you probably have a somewhat decent idea of who they are as a person and some glimpses of their relationship. any advice you give in that situation may be wrong because your friend may not understand the problem, their emotions could be clouding their judgment, or they may not have been completely sincere. and you don’t want that to be a lousy piece of advice that they are still mad at you about years later because your opinion led them down the wrong path for them. what’s right for you may not be right for them – and that’s okay. whether you have an emotional investment in the situation or not, you will appear to be biased if you back your friend up, even if the other person is in the wrong.
then they could accuse you of not being a good friend by supporting and validating them, which means they probably aren’t going to talk to you. your presence is likely to help more than you realize. you may also want to restate the problem back to them to ensure that you understand it. this will also help you better understand the problem by providing additional context that your friend may not have brought up before. they want to hear direct advice or get some help with a situation that they are having trouble with. “listen, i can’t tell you what is right for you with 100% confidence. “just take what i say as guidance only, and not something that you must do. it’s your life and you should think carefully about anything i say before coming to your own decision.” attention please: our brand new youtube channel is live.
between sips and bites, she confides in you that she and her boyfriend of two years might be heading toward a breakup. after all, the stakes feel impossibly high; you don’t want to mislead your friend during one of the biggest crises of her life. and you might have had an easier time figuring out those tricky math equations on the sat than you’re having right now, attempting to figure out how to counsel your friend. she had been advising her family and friends her whole life. suddenly, she was spending a lot of time crying next to the office vending machines, holing up at her desk to avoid spotting her ex in the cafeteria, and seeking advice from her own friends at the cheesecake factory. she doubted her ability to write the column. i asked goldstein how to give your friends the best advice possible — even when you have no idea what to say or do. “one danger of giving advice is projecting your own experiences,” she says.
or if you’re recalling a painful breakup from years ago, you might gloss over exactly how difficult it was at the time. so, don’t worry about offering your two cents just because you haven’t dealt with the exact problem your friend is struggling with. “they’re looking for time and space to process the reasons for their feelings. no one is going to do exactly what you say. a decade later, goldstein says that friend is still happily married — but a lot of her other friends whose relationships she supported and celebrated haven’t turned out as well. “you don’t want to bring your agenda to your advice as a friend,” she warns. even if you’d love another single friend to go out with on weekends, that doesn’t mean you should encourage your bff to end her relationship. “no one is going to do exactly what you say,” goldstein says. all you need to do is listen and show your love.
remind your friend or loved one that most relationships problems are universal. concerns about sex, communication, and financial decision-making are especially 1. avoid giving direct advice unless specifically asked. and even then, maybe not. 2. remember that you only know one side of the story. 3. rather than worrying about coming up with one flawless piece of advice, focus your energy on being a good listener. “the friend isn’t looking, good advice to give a friend about breakups, what to say to a friend with relationship problems, what to say to a friend who is sad about being single, what is the best relationship advice you’ve ever received.
they only want the best for you, but are they qualified to give you guidance? just because you liked the friend-version of someone doesn’t mean you’ll like the relationship-version of them. 25. before you move in with your partner, go on hans: if you’re developing feelings for a friend, take it slow and easy. explore those feelings and spend lots of time getting to know the, giving relationship advice meme, giving relationship advice meme, psychological advice on relationships, word of advice for relationship, relationship advice for couples. the best way to approach giving dating advice if your single friend askstake your personal experience out of the conversation. listen without making any judgments or assumptions. help your friend to identify their patterns. show empathy and be encouraging. avoid clichxe9s. set boundaries with them.
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