i’ve decided to no longer post and answer letters involving topics i feel like i’ve covered enough already, but this is a new issue and i wanted to share it (trigger warning: mention of suicide). i made boxes of his favorite things for his friends and family, saved a few things for myself, and liquidated the rest. my brother and my first husband weren’t particularly close, but they got along well enough. i loved that rolex and i wanted it to go to someone special, but it felt too painful to keep it for myself. over the years, as my trauma has healed and i’ve moved on with my life, i’ve started slowly wearing jewelry from my late first husband again. i’m happily remarried, but a death is not the same as a breakup and i feel i can love and honor both parties; i don’t need to choose loyalty, and my current husband agrees. i asked my brother and he said he keeps it in a safe deposit box, wearing it 1-2 times per year.
i asked if he would give it back, and he didn’t outright refuse but he did push back. on the one hand, i fully understand that i gave it to him and he’s entitled to keep it. but i’d like your opinion on if i’m wrong to ask for it back, given that i wasn’t in my right mind when i gave it away and i had to make a lot of snap decisions in that fragile state. also, i paid off about 60k in my brother’s student loans from life insurance money, so i have been generous with him on the whole. — rollin without a rolex like many of you, i’ve been outraged since learning about the supreme court’s plan to overturn roe v. wade this summer, making abortion illegal in 26 states. every person capable of getting pregnant deserves autonomy over their body and the agency to decide whether and when to have a baby and to become a parent. every person with a uterus deserves basic healthcare – access to lifesaving treatments – without the threat of criminalization. if you’re as outraged as i am that any of this is even debatable, please consider raising your voice at the women’s march on saturday the 14th.
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