in part one of this two-part post, we’ll dive into the first half of the episode and learn about jordan’s marriage of 50 years, and how to start opening yourself up to what you want in life. i’ve had the honor of interviewing dr. peterson in the past (episodes #664 and #665), and it was a joy to have him back on the show! this is what jordan says is one of the advantages of marriage: it seems to be easier for us to reveal ourselves completely, wounds and all, when we’re with a partner who has made that official, on-paper commitment to stick with us unconditionally. jordan peterson when we think of jealousy and insecurity in a relationship, the first thing we think of is usually the infamous wandering eye, or the idea that your partner might not be as faithful and monogamous as you’re relying on them to be. i’m working at a job i can’t stand because i need to support my wife and children and that’s okay.’ sometimes that is okay, but it has to be out in the open, talked about, negotiated, and discussed.
jordan peterson “a slave, a tyrant, or a negotiator.” that might be difficult to hear, but when you secretly feel like you’re always sacrificing your own happiness and goals to make sure your partner is happy, over time you really can start to feel like a slave. discipline is about raising a child to become disciplined: in other words, strong and resilient. however, he also warns both mental health professionals and their clients that sometimes when there is a crisis, well-meaning professionals can, unfortunately, rush in to discuss the trauma while it’s still happening. you remember something bad and you process it so that you change your interpretation, or your behavior, or the situation so that it isn’t going to happen in the future.” –dr. i hope you enjoy part one as much as i did, and that you’re excited to wrap it all up in part two!
there are many temptations to organize our life around the experience of earlier trauma. so, i was pleased to see he was delving a bit into my area of expertise and i was curious about his ideas. on the other hand, it also means that no one is doomed and improvement is possible for everyone. from there, you may also need to work on building trust with others and improving your own self-esteem, so that you have the belief in yourself and your partner to brave these learning experiences together. thus, it is essential to know what you want from a romantic partner, to learn to negotiate a fair exchange with them, and to have the skills to deal with arguments that will inevitably arise.
peterson writes: “instead, the couple can decide that each and both are subordinate to a principle, a higher-order principle, which constitutes their union in the spirit of illumination and truth… voluntary subordination to this higher-order principle of illumination both unifies and revitalizes.” essentially, this helps both partners break away from the day-to-day stresses and annoyances, to focus on the long-term goal of building a special connection with one another. what will happen is that the absolute necessities of life will inexorably start to take priority over the desirable necessities. each partner is weighing the pros and cons of having sex and is motivated by a particular desire or goal to have sex, too. instead, to influence the behavior of a partner for the better, it is more effective to reward their positive actions and express gratitude to one another. there are many temptations to organize our life around the experience of earlier trauma.
relationship advice | jordan b peterson it makes according to jordan, successful relationships are all about creating a space where the boundaries are clearly defined, and each partner can trust the other to to summarize, the key to a happy relationship is to tell your partner what you would like them to do in a polite way and then genuinely rewarding your partner, jordan peterson inspiration, jordan peterson inspiration, jordan peterson relationships quotes, jordan peterson relationships book, jordan peterson relationship podcast.
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