there are many temptations to organize our life around the experience of earlier trauma. jayda, of course, continued to see him secretly and fell in love with him. cognitive dissonance theory (festinger, 1957) predicts that exerting more effort to achieve a goal will lead to valuing the achievement of that goal more so than if very little effort were necessary to achieve it (see aronson and mills, 1959). sharing secrets can also enhance one’s commitment to a relationship and facilitate the development of a couple’s sense of “we” or “us” (richardson, 1988).
although forbidden relationships may be strengthened by the disapproval of others over the short term, over the long term, relationships that are supported by friends and family members are happier and more likely to endure (sinclair et al., 2014). the journal of abnormal and social psychology, 59(2), 177–181. the interactive effects of intent and threat on boomerang attitude change. secrecy and status: the social construction of forbidden relationships.
forbidden love might feel safer to someone with a fear of abandonment because you can predict, to some extent, that the partnership won’t work out. the match between the two of you was considered appropriate in every way, and it was thought to be a foregone conclusion that the two of you would be married someday. like the curiosity that the forbidden things in life can prompt, the forbidden can also give you somewhat of a rush. it’s forbidden, and you would probably have to keep it a secret.
it is a way of proclaiming that we are alive and we’re going to do whatever it is that we like, the consequences be damned. it tends to break the trust your partner has in you, or at least, put a dent in it until you build that trust back up. before you get involved with forbidden love or continue a forbidden love connection, it may be time to get introspective about how this could impact your life and if it’s what you truly want. if you take the time to get introspective, you could save yourself and your partner from a lot of pain. again, the answer to that can be nuanced, and it depends heavily on why exactly your love is considered forbidden.
prohibiting friendships or relationships often forces us to keep those relationships a secret in order to continue them. research shows that when love is not forbidden, there’s a higher chance that it will work out. the person’s available, and they can commit to you. as long as people have been falling in love, social norms have prevented some lovers from being together. forbidden love applies whenever taboo tries to, .
at what point does forbidden attraction become love? come clean, they say. tell your lover you’re in love with someone else. have you engaged in a “forbidden” relationship? “forbidden love is the strongest”, is it true?, .
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