here, one woman shares her most significant sexual first “i don’t have an extraordinarily strong record of maintaining monogamy. it was a difficult standard for me to adhere to, prior to my current relationship, and so i wasn’t really enacting any ethics. and so with my current relationship of seven years, it’s not that there was a risk of falling back into old habits—i didn’t meet someone new or see something coming—but i knew i had an appetite for extra-curricular activity. my partner was open to the possibility of us being open, but he wasn’t sure what that would mean. but there wasn’t really an ‘okay, let’s go.’ what happened is that i slept with someone else. it was with someone i knew, and i certainly didn’t leave the house knowing that this was a thing that was going to happen, but i think it felt a lot safer.
there was a novelty about sleeping with someone new, and about it being someone i knew, and it was a good one in the context of sexual experiences. it did feel different than the times i cheated in the past, though, because we’d had conversations about this being a possibility, and i leaned on the fact that at some point, the trigger was going to be pulled. my partner wasn’t pleased about it, but it became pretty apparent i wanted an open relationship quite pointedly and urgently, so we determined that it was something we were both going to explore mutually. when we started sleeping with other people, the goal was more about sexual exploration and bringing home something new in that regard. we maintain the sanctity of our shared space—so people don’t come over—and we don’t stay the night. but for us, it became apparent that to avoid any inkling of doubt or jealousy or fear of the unknown, we were going to have to talk about almost literally everything. that wasn’t expected, but it’s pretty f-cking cool.”—as told to danielle groen the first time i had sex after getting sober the first time i had sex in my correct gender the first time i had sex after giving birth the first time i had sex after being assaulted the first time i had sex with myself the first time i had sex after major surgery the first time i had sex after coming out the first time i had sex after an abortion the first time i had sex after my marriage ended
honesty is the single most important part of any open relationship. in order to settle into a relationship that you and your partner are 5 mistakes people opening up relationships make 1. trying to keep everything the same 2. attempting to avoid jealousy by dating the same we spoke to some experts about how to navigate opening your relationship for the first time. spoiler alert: communication is key., open relationship boundaries list, open relationship boundaries list, psychology of open relationships, one-sided open relationship rules, benefits of an open relationship.
the first time i had sex after opening up my relationship. losing your virginity isn’t necessarily the biggest first in your life. 1. start by doing research about non-monogamy. 2. talk to your friends about non-monogamy. 3. if you can, see a relationship therapist or this was the first rule we made up: this is our primary relationship. we make a point not to spend too much time with secondary partners., signs of an open marriage, open relationships are toxic, dating someone in an open relationship, signs he wants an open relationship, the most common open relationship rules and how to set yours, successful open relationships, types of open relationships, do open relationships work, i want an open relationship but he doesn’t, being the girlfriend in an open marriage.
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