if you or a partner have struggled with trust issues, it’s likely to come up in your relationship. people with trust issues, according to both beurkens and moran, will also work from the assumption that people are intentionally doing things to hurt them. as a result of the assumptions and commitment-phobia, many people with trust issues will withdraw at the smallest sign of trouble, moran says. when we feel distrusting and assume the worst, it can often result in being reactive and picking fights, even over petty things. trust issues may cause you to feel overprotective and hypervigilant, beurkens notes, both of yourself and who you’re close to. trust issues develop as a result of our past or present experiences.
beurkens notes that if someone experienced betrayal, abandonment, or harm when they were young, this can lead to trust issues as an adult. as such, infidelity is a common cause of trust issues. “a real attachment injury ties right to trust: something happens in the relationship where the hurt partner decides on a certain level, ‘you’re unsafe, and i can never trust you again.'” a big portion of the work when it comes to trust issues is learning to get comfortable with risk. mindfulness can be a good practice to help you stay in the present, and “learn to more objectively evaluate what is happening now, and not be swept away emotionally by assumptions,” she says. but it is possible to overcome trust issues so your relationships with those you love can flourish.
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