but when you’re dangling a fishing pole in the seemingly vast ocean of online dating and not getting many nibbles, it can leave you with a seasick feeling. “online dating can be a powerful tool for clients who are more shy or introverted and unlikely to approach new people in public. “it’s similar to a multicultural issue, or working with a client who has an aspect of their culture that’s not familiar [to the counselor]. [clients’] attitudes about themselves and connecting to others are a major factor in meeting others and the dating process.” counselors can help clients work through past issues that spill over into their online dating experiences and prepare them for the challenges that can be a natural part of dating, dack says. it’s what you do to manage it and respond to it [that matters].” counselors can help clients maintain a healthy perspective and remain true to themselves even as they navigate the sometimes-choppy waters of online dating. smith works with clients to monitor and create boundaries for the amount of time they spend focusing on online dating.
people might not own up to that at first, but if you ask, it may be surprising how much they are focusing on it.” know your client: clients who have struggled with anxious or obsessive behaviors in the past may find it difficult to resist checking and rechecking a dating app for messages or new matches. or have the goal that i’m going to do this [go on a date] and be ok the next day. this can help teach clients what levels of self-disclosure are appropriate when meeting a potential match and how to express themselves in healthy, genuine ways, she says. with clients who find themselves overthinking aspects of the dating process, smith says it can be helpful for a counselor to ask, “how would you know you are doing this as maturely as possible? feeling good about yourself and believing you have something to offer is a key part of dating success. accept some anxiety as natural: counselors who understand online dating can help clients set realistic expectations about the process and prepare them for the reality that meeting new people and opening themselves to rejection is bound to involve some measure of anxiety, dack says.
that said, life is not always about walking over a petal of roses. the constant desire to be accepted at all times, as well as the possibility of rejection can lead one to feel insecure, which may further generate trust issues. in order to create and deepen connections, it is key to be practical about ways to enter into new relationships and improve current ones.
sometimes it’s as simple as spending time grabbing coffee with an old friend or your so. if you are comparing intentions and setting goals in your relationships, goals can create more pressure and intentions can create more peace. if you are setting timelines for your social and relationship goals, be gentle yourself and create a balance of realistic goals and intentions that bring you inner peace. when your goals start stressing you out, it actually takes much longer for them to manifest.
yes, online dating carries the potential for disappointment and anxiety, acknowledges rachel dack, a licensed clinical professional counselor looking for a personal dating counselling? betterlyf has an experienced team of dating coaches with a fantastic track record. we are here to help with dating counseling in scottsdale az. give us a call at 480-235-1682 if you have any questions or to book an appointment., relationship counseling, relationship counseling, dating coach, should dating couples go to counseling, dating therapist reddit.
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