advice in unreliability in relationship

this becomes problematic when struggling to choose between the dichotomy of a kind, reliable, and respectable partner vs. one who is exciting, thrilling, and unpredictable. consciously, you might believe you want a partner and that the problem is with others, rather than something that should be explored in yourself. considerable energy is devoted to assembly, fortifying the structure, and decorating the interior with the predictability and banality of a life together. the question becomes: can you integrate something you long for with moderation to prevent over-consumption and eventual disenchantment?

the problem is that you are using others to solve a problem that originates within yourself. in turn, you may make attempts to reduce that danger and dependency by making the love more predictable and monotonous. daughters of divorce: overcome the legacy of your parents’ breakup and enjoy a happy, long-lasting relationship. there are many temptations to organize our life around the experience of earlier trauma.

adjust your expectations and figure out whether you’re prepared to deal with the uncertainty of an unreliable person. you’ve got to look at the way someone treats you (and others) to figure out whether they are unreliable. is it the bad anxiety that keeps you on-edge and irritated? someone who keeps too many secrets from you is someone who could be unreliable in the future. be prepared: if they behave like that in terms of their own life, they’ll show up even less to fight your corner.

you need to know who you’re dealing with before you can do anything about the unreliable person. it’s so crucial that you adjust your expectations if you decide to keep the unreliable person in your life. lower the bar if you’re going to keep them in your life, and create a relationship that sustains minimal damage when they lash out or disappear. at the end of the day, the unreliable person is going to bring heartbreak and upset into your life. it’s important to be honest about the quality of the people who are in our lives. always have a “plan b” to fall back on and make sure you don’t give up plans or stop doing what you’re doing until they show up.

as with many other issues in relationships and communication, the best starting point tends to be an open and honest conversation. if what your partner is doing don’t settle for an unreliable relationship where you’re never sure whether your person is going to follow through. where you’re used to broken promises. as with many other issues in relationships, the best starting point tends to be an open and honest conversation. if what your partner is doing, .

use “i” statements. if you want to confront someone about their unreliability, focus on how it affects you. “explain things from your perspective and how it feels for you when they miss important events, are perpetually late, etc.,” says mcbain. 1. chronic unreliability. you might think of your partner simply as scattered or flaky. but the damage of never being able to know if they will for example, you might seek partners who mirror traits analogous to your parents’ relationship with regard to power imbalances or emotional take an honest look at your relationship with this person and gauge it for what it is. be honest about how they treat you and how they cannot, .

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